When To Expect The Unexpected
by purpledragon6
Summary: Bill had every chance to end Pinetree. He had every chance and yet he waited for this one. The exact moment that he could ruin Pinetree's life slowly and forever, and all it would take was just one little deal and one big mistake. T for swearing. Mentions of Mpreg and Billdip. Read at your own risk!
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Okay, so this fanfiction doesn't have a reason or a title just yet, but it will. This is possibly a one-shot or an actual stories, depending on what you guys think.**

 **WARNING! DO NOT READ ON UNTIL YOU'VE READ THIS!: THIS CONTAINS BILLDIP, A.K.A YAOI! AND MPREG FOR THAT MATTER AND HUMAN BILL. PLEASE DO NOT READ OR FLAME THIS STORY IF THESE ARE ALL THINGS THAT YOU DO NOT LIKE! PLEASE TURN AROUND AND GO BACK IN WHICH YOU'VE COME!**

 **Takes place after Sock Opera.**

* * *

From the moment they met, Bill knew that Dipper was a special one. He was clever, he caught onto things quickly, and he was, in lack of a better term, resourceful. However, the boy was still a human, and a child human at that. Bill knew that there would be times when the boy would slip up, or when he wouldn't realize things until just to late. Now was one of those times.

* * *

Hunched over the leaking toilet of the Mystery Shack, Dipper hung his head in bitter despair, his guys twisting up into knots and his stomach burning as he attempted too keep his breakfast down, on top of also actually wanting more breakfast than what he had taken earlier. This was a typical morning event for the boy, as it had been for the last few days. He didn't know if he should be concerned for it or not, trying to call back to his memory all of the instances where he could have gotten sick, or any illness he might have read about before that caused such symptoms for so long. He didn't have much long to think, as a sudden wave of pain washed over his whole being once more, and this time not from his strange illness.

"Whatcha doing, Pinetree?" An all too familiar, and very annoying voice came from behind Dipper, followed by yet another jab in the ribs by what he assumed was a cane of some kind.

"Ugh... What do you want, Bill?" Dipper groaned, pulling his head out of the toilet and sitting back quickly in an attempt to get the golden triangle off of his back.

"Just checking up on you." Bill replied idly, suddenly floating out in front of Dipper and twirling his cane around in midair.

The human glared up at Bill with more hatred than usual. Of all times for Bill to just pop in, unannounced, and act as annoying as he could, this was a horrible time. It was also a rather random time, and not being as big of an idiot as most thought him to be, Dipper was quick to begin wondering what the point of this whole visit was. Growling lowly, he staggered to his feet with the intentions of finding out.

"Just to check up on me? You must think I'm pretty dumb if you thought I was going to believe that." Dipper spat, crossing his arms over his chest and glaring. "Especially since the last time we met, you stole my body and tried to burn my journal!"

"But I mean it this time, Pin-" Before Bill could even finish, a roll of toilet paper was suddenly chucked at his head. "Hey, hey! I'm being honest here, scouts honor and everything!"

"Bill, you always have a stupid reason for showing up!" Dipper huffed, suddenly finding his head back in the toilet, as another false alarm began to wash over him.

"Okay, fine. So maybe I did come over to see someone else." Bill admitted, his bottom lid pulling up in a sheepish way.

"Mable?" Dipper coughed, wiping the back of his mouth with his head as he looked back up at Bill.

"Nope." The demon replied, floating around Dipper's head slowly. "Guess again."

"If you're looking for Grunkle Stan, I'm pretty sure hes ready with salt." Dipper muttered, trying to smack at the demon.

"Close, but no." Bill laughed, patting Dipper's head before floating a little lower, so he was almost eye level with Dipper. "And I'm already gonna tell you, its not question mark either."

"I'm out of ideas then, man. You're just going to have to tell me." Dipper sighed, trying once again to push the demon away.

"Well, normally I would say that I don't have to tell you anything, but I guess if I don't tell you now then you'll just find out later on." With what Dipper assumed was a smile, the dream demon idly reached out with his cane and poked Dipper in the stomach with it. "Our baby, silly."

If Bill had seen this coming, then he probably would have done something to try and stop him, but sadly he didn't. In one quick move, Dipper had taken Bill's cane out of his grip and was currently using it to smack Bill in the head with. However, Bill allowed him to do this.

"W-what the heck are you talking about!?" Dipper gasped, suddenly tossing the cane aside. "First off, I'm a guy! Second off, we never even had sex before!"

'Always expect the unexpected' should have been a quote to live by when it came to living with a creature such as Bill always hovering around nearby you. It was also a quote that Dipper was now etching into the back of his brain, as Bill suddenly hovered over to where Dipper's tummy was and was now nuzzling it lovingly, completely ignoring Dipper's comments. This lasted for about a minute before Bill suddenly sprung away and was now eye level with Dipper once again.

"You're funny." Bill commented, suddenly poking Dipper's cheek. "Its almost like you forgot that one, I'm a demon, and two; your silly 'Human Rules' don't apply to me. I can mate with whoever I want, regardless of gender."

Dipper felt his face flush, his earlier anger suddenly melting into what he would consider to be some kind of fear. Frowning, he looked up at Bill, now more curious than ever but having way to many questions to ask at once to really speak up properly. So instead, he just stood there and prayed that Bill would catch on and just answer everything for him.

"How- When-" Was all Dipper gave Bill to go off of.

"Well, you remember when I 'borrowed' your body that one time? Well, while I was in there, I noticed it was pretty durable, and so I left a little something in there for when I left." Bill answered, as if he was simply explaining the weather to Dipper.

"W-what!? Why me of all people!" Dipper exclaimed, looking at Bill as though he had grown a second head.

"Well... I figured you'd be okay with it and-" A sudden slap cut Bill off.

"Why the heck would I be okay with this!?" Dipper all but yelled, suddenly grabbing Bill from two of his three sides and shaking him rather violently. "I'm a teenage boy! Its not normal for that age- Well, it kinda is now... But its not normal for that gender group to be pregnant!"

"Well, you're such a Mother Hen anyway, and you're really adorable so I thought it would be okay." Bill explained, suddenly reaching out a hand and petting Dipper's head in an attempt to calm him down. "Besides, its not like I'm going to up and leave you."

"Oh great... Now I'll be stuck with you and some kid I don't even want for the rest of my life..." Dipper muttered, sitting down on the edge of the toilet and glaring up at Bill.

"Well, thats kind of how mates and children work, Pinetree." Bill said, still stroking the other's hair idly. "Geez, I thought all humans were supposed to know that."

"We do..." Dipper muttered, looking over at Bill and huffing out of his chest once more. "You realize also that I hate you more than usual, right?"

"Thats just the hormones talking." Bill replied, patting the other's stomach suddenly. "Don't listen to mommy, baby."

"No its not... Daddy is seriously pissing mommy off..." Maybe it was though, because Dipper soon felt a small smile tug at the corners of his lips.

Yeah, that much had to be the baby's doing. There was no way in hell that Dipper could willingly be okay with this... Could he?


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Welcome back to chapter 2 of WTETU! I am currently typing off of my phone and its a little difficult with my autocorrect still on xD**

* * *

"Well, you remember when I 'borrowed' your body that one time? Well, while I was in there, I noticed it was pretty durable, and so I left a little something in there for when I left."

* * *

Sweat slicked hair and a heaving chest were the first two things Dipper had registered as he sat up in his bed, following by an immediate grasp at his pajama shirt, directly over his stomach where those hands had been in his dream. That one sentence kept echoing in his mind as he grasped at the shirt, sighing in relief when he discovered that it was flat. With even the skin under the material voided of any sort of bump or bulk that shouldn't have been there. A few deep breaths was all it took for Dipper to settle his rapidly beating heart, as he tiredly pulled himself from his bed, letting his tangled bedsheets fall free from his body at their own accord.

Shivering softly at the sudden drop in temperature, he wiped the remaining sweat from his forehead and allowed the cold to take care of the rest of the heat on his body and clothes.

"It was all just a dream..." He thought to himself as he shuffles through the chilled air of the Mystery Shack, intending to leave his summer bedroom and hopefully find some comfort in the form of the downstairs TV. "It was just a trick..."

Wincing softly as his sock covered feet touched the annoyingly squeaky stairs, he slowly and carefully attempted to make his way down them without any further noise in fear of waking the other residences of his summer home. As of now, he really just wanted to be on his own, and he really didn't want anyone asking him what was wrong.

After all, how could he even answer them? That dream was something that he never wanted to relive or repeat, as it was just to crazy and downright impossible even.

'Anything you can conceive is possible in the mindscape.'

The memory of that simple fact alone sent chills of fear and discomfort down Dipper's spine, and the occasional creaks from the stairs did nothing to calm his already frazzled nerves. Chocolate brown eyes suddenly darted down to their owner's arm in a sudden and unplanned movement, as another shudder ran through the poor boy at the sight of several scars, left by healing puncture wounds from what he remembered to be forks.

"Anything... But not this..." Dipper muttered as he rubbed one of the dull wounds gently, still feeling a bit of a sting as he did it. "All Bill did was take my body...He only did this to mess with me."

Dropping his arm to his side suddenly, he finished his decent down the flight of stairs quickly before silently running to the safe place that was the old chair in the livingroom. From there, Dipper took notice of a few things. The first being that the clock on the DVD player only read 3:00am, and the second being that the early morning darkness that filled the room was rather comforting to him, as most of his worries suddenly drifted away in the gloom.

"It was just a bad dream." He muttered from the doorway, slowly stepping through it and entering into the room, blindly shuffling across the carpet before he finally reached the chair and sat down.

With a tired grunt, he swiped the remote off of the chair side table and flipped on the TV, not caring what channel he turned to as long as whatever came on was silly, stupid, or anything else that would wipe his short term memory of that horrible dream. Taking a deep breath, he settled on Gravity Falls' worst movie channel before settling further into the couch.

'That's all it was..." He thought, feeling his eyes go heavy the instant they landed on the TV screen. Despite him not wanting to drift to sleep again, he found himself fighting the dense fog that soon clouded his vision, followed by the darkness that came with his sleep. Bright images from the TV soon faded, and he soon found himself slipping into a nothingness, a dreamless type of sleep,that for once he found rather welcoming.

* * *

"Hey, Dipper!" Mable's voice and the honey coloured glow of the morning sun rise greeted Dipper as he awoke. "Wake up before Grunkle Stan and I eat all of the pancakes!"

"Good morning to you too, Mable..." Dipper grumbled as he dragged himself off of the chair, quickly tapping the remote to shut off the TV before flowing his bouncy sister into the kitchen.

A rather disgruntled grunt sounded through the somewhat quiet kichen as the twins entered, their Grunkle not once looking up from his morning paper as they shuffled in. However, the paper was soon lowered and set aside once the two had pulled out their respective seats and sat down. This was the older man's way of letting the kids know that they were free to talk, as Dipper had learned from spending quite a few mornings with the conarist.

"Geez, Dip. You look terrible." Stan began the morning conversation, slowly getting up and going over to a nearby pan and picking it up off of the stove. "You feelin' alright, kid?"

"H-huh?" Dipper gasped, looking up and suddenly at a loss for words as he stared silently at Stan for a few minutes before finally answering him. "Um, yeah. Just had trouble sleeping last night."

"If it was because of all that summer reading you do, then I'm confiscating all of your books." Stan teased in his most serious tone, slowly serving each child before sitting back down with the pan still in hand. "But in all seriousness, I want you to head back to bed after your breakfast. Can't have my employees looking like they've just seen a ghost or something."

"Grunkle Stan!" Mable giggled as she began to douse her pancakes in syrup. "When doesn't Dipper look like he's seen a ghost?"

"Hah. Funny." Dipper mumbled as he soon copied his sister's actions with the syrup while listening to his relatives' soft laughs at the small joke. "But I'm fine, really."

"No buts about it. Finish your breakfast and get back to bed." Stan said sternly, casually lifting his paper once more in a 'this conversations over' type way.

"Alright, fine..." Dipper huffed, stabbing his breakfast with his fork before eating a bit of pancake.

It wasn't the best breakfast he had eaten during his stay in the Mystery Shack, but it certainly wasn't the worst either. The pancakes were a little more lumpy than he would have wanted them, but it was nothing that some off-brand syrup couldn't fix. Once finished, he did just as his Grunkle had told him and shuffled off towards the stairs that lead up to his bedroom door.

"Good night, Dip!" Mable called to him from the kitchen, causing a soft smile to form on her brothers otherwise pale face.

"Night, Mable..." Dipper called back, slowly turning back to the stairs and starting up them.

The moment he started up the stairs, he could feel the same heaviness in his limbs and eyes that he had felt back on the chair in the livingroom. With each step, he couldn't help but feel that maybe his Grunkle was right when he said that Dipper needed more sleep, as each step felt more challenging to him. His tired limbs and mind were ready to just curl up on the stairs and sleep one of those dreamless dreams right there.

'Just a few more steps to go...' Dipper thought between a soft yawn, his eyes closing as the yawn caused them to water up a little.

However, they didn't open after that, as the darkness had already claimed the messy haired boy, and his hand now limp with sleep let go of the handrail.


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Welcome back to chapter 3 of WTETU! I am currently typing off of my phone and its a little difficult with my autocorrect still on xD**

 **Summary of chapter: Dipper and Stan have a man to man talk shortly before Dipper goes out in search of answers relating to his strange dream.**

* * *

"You're okay, Dip. I've got ya." Grunkle Stan's rarely used tone of concern gently awoke Dipper from his strange state of rest, causing the boy to groan lowly as he attempted to sit up.

"W-what happened...?" Dipper muttered before opening his eyes and quickly trying to take in his surroundings.

From what he could see, he was in his own bed once again, but by now the once early morning sun rise had now turned into a sunset, causing the boy's heart to clench a little in surprise and curiosity. Before he fell asleep so abruptly, he hadn't felt very tired, except when he began up the stairs to his bedroom. Suddenly, he turned to his Grunkle, who was sitting uncharacteristically at his bedside.

"Grunkle Stan?" Dipper began again, frowning at that moment as he registered several aches in random places through his whole person suddenly.

"You fell down the stairs, kid." Stan piped up, reaching over to a glass of water that sat on the bedside table and offering it over to Dipper. "You were completely dead to the world when your sister got to you."

"That's weird..." Dipper muttered, slowly reaching out his thin arm to accept the glass of water and quickly drawing it back to his person.

However, he didn't drink it right away. His throat didn't feel incredibly dry, but he knew it would probably be for the good of his health that he had a sip or two. Just not right at that moment. No, for now the water glass just seemed to be a tether to him, keeping him in reality and away from his streams again. He just hoped that his Grunkle wouldn't take notice of this comforting tick just yet.

"Have you been staying up late lately?" Stan questioned suddenly, studying the boy's face quizzically for signs of dark bags or other proof of lack of sleep.

"No. I got plenty of sleep last night." Dipper assured him, resisting the urge to roll his eyes at the question.

"And you don't have any issues medical wise that I should know about, right?" The con man snapped, though he still didn't seem very convinced by the other's first response. "Cause falling asleep while standing up seems like a medical issue of sorts."

"Trust me, if I did then I would have let you know." The younger male sighed, taking a few more sips of the cool water before handing the glass back to the other.

The two suddenly went silent, a growing tension evident around them. If he knew what to say, then Dipper would have searched for another topic of conversation, but every topic that came to his mind always seemed to lead to a discussion about that bizarre dream of his. He took a sudden and deep breath, about to bare with the quiet just a little longer when suddenly Stan spoke up again.

"Is something bothering you, Dip?" Stan asked suddenly, folding his hands in his lap slowly and studying his great - nephew over once more. "I mean, I don't know much about kids and their emotions, but I do know when someone is thinking hard about something... I think."

"Nothing is wrong! I just got tired and fell asleep is all. I'm a growing male and its perfectly normal."

"Listen, kid. Ever since your sister had that creepy sock - show a few days ago, you've been acting differently, and not even the funny kind of different that we sometimes make fun of you for." Stan said, folding his arms over his chest and lowering his eyebrows in a 'I'm not leaving this spot until you tell me the truth' way. "Its not just this one time that's concerning me. This is the second time in one week that you've collapsed and its weird even for you."

"I've just been having an off week is all." Dipper said with a gentle sigh, hoping that it was convincing enough to fool the other. "Lots of crazy things happening at once and all..."

"Kid, you know I'm not leaving until I can buy it, right?" Apparently not.

Dipper swallowed thickly, with some spot in the back of his mind wishing that he had kept the water glass instead of handing it back. At least then he could have used it as an excuse to stay quiet, or as quiet as he could have been while fake drinking. That wasn't the case and he now found himself staring down his nose at the hardened gaze of his usually disproving and inattantive Grunkle. However, the longer he silently stared up at him, the more he began to sense genuine concern coming from the older man.

'This is Grunkle Stan I'm talking to...' Dipper thought with another soft sigh. 'Sure he's a lying, cheating, manipulative conman, but he can keep a secret better than anyone...'

"I'm waiting still." Stan cut in suddenly, frowning a little deeper as he spoke to Dipper. "This I my waiting face, by the way."

"Okay... But promise not to tell anyone?" Dipper asked, watching meekly as Stan began to slowly nod his head. "Alright... So you remember that journal I-"

"Kid, don't tell me that boring old book is what's been keeping you up lately." Stan cut in, frowning now in a much more disproving way and rolling his eyes.

"No... Ugh! This is going to sound really weird and stupid, but when Gedion took over the Mystery Shack, he got it by summoning this dream demon named Bill an-" Dipper would have kept going, if he hadn't heard Stan's breath suddenly hitch and watch as his eyes went wide. "Grunkle Stan?"

"I'm fine, kid. Just keep going." Stan replied with a shake of the head before adding under his breath, "Just trying to get over how crazy and stupid that sounds is all and what not..."

"Okay...? So, he summoned this dream named Bill, and he's kind of been a major pain in my butt since the day we met, but the other day before the sock opera I may have made a stupid deal with him so-"

"Kid, when is a deal with a demon EVER a good idea?" Stan suddenly cut in once again, seeming very interested all of a sudden.

"Never... But we found this laptop in the woods and it might lead us to the au-" Dipper held his tongue suddenly as Stan boldly stood up, looking ready to leave the room.

"Look, you've seen a lot of messed up things lately, and that's probably what's causing you to act all weird and w-" It was now Dipper's turn to cut off his Grunkle.

"Wait! I switched bodies with Bill before the opera and I just had this really weird dream that I was pregnant with his kid, or something, and I don't know if it has anything to do with the deal, or if he's just messing with me, or-"

What Dipper hadn't expected was the firm hand that suddenly, but also gently, pushing him back against his bed and the second hand that was laid over his temple, undoubtedly searching for a fever or a bump on the head.

"Kid. It was just a bad dream." Stan gently assured him. "Stop worrying about it, okay?"

"O-okay..." Dipper sighed, knowing that there was no way Stan was going to listen to anymore of his story.

"Just get some more rest, kid. I'll call you when dinners ready." Stan sighed, swiftly moving from the boy's bedside and over to the door, ready to take his leave.

"Alright... Thanks, Grunkle Stan..."

"Any time, kid."

With that, the old man left, leaving Dipper once again alone to himself and his thoughts, and for a moment Dipper couldn't tell what was scarier. The fact that he had actually told Stan, or the fact that he was now alone again and one step closer to another strange as heck dream with Bill again. Sitting up quickly, he hurried over to his journal and flipped on his black light.

"I don't care what Stan says... Something weird is going on, and I'm going to figure out what it is..."

* * *

Meanwhile, once safely outside of the boy's room, Stan felt himself let out a breath that he hadn't been aware that he was even holding to begin with. His great - nephew's final statement was still ringing in his head as he hurried down the stairs and headed towards his secret hide away behind the candy machine in the gift shop. He was concerned for Dipper, and in more ways than one.

'Bill... Seriously? Doesn't that kid ev-" His thoughts and his path were suddenly cut off but his bubbly little niece, who had come right out of nowhere.

"Grunkle Stan, can we have pizza for dinner?" She chirped, twirling around in a little circle around the man before coming to a hault.

"Um, sure. Listen Mable, would you mind going to the kitchen and ordering it? I've got some things I need to tend to an-"

"Say no more. I'm on it!" Mable exclaimed, suddenly rushing from the room and heading in the direction of the kitchen.

Sighing in relief, Stan made quick work of getting to the machine, typing in his secret password as quickly as he could, and then disappearing into his secret hide away. He had done that set of steps so many times before, but today it felt different. Pushing that aside, he entered into his lab as normal and stood before his desk now.

"Bill..."

"You called?" Within an instance, the world around him turned to grey, and Stan winced at the sound of the dream demon's chipper tone. "What's u-"

"Cut it with the pleasantries, Cipher. I'm not in the mood for your crap." The old man barked, turning his head quickly and catching sight of the triangle.

"Geez, someone is sure in a mood today." Bill huffed, idly twirling his cane around as he spoke.

"We had a deal, Cipher." Stan growled, his fists balling up tightly.

"Oh? Did we?" Bill mused, setting his cane aside mid-air in favour of floating over to Stan. "Care to refresh my memory?"

"When that little jerk-face attacked my brain, we made a deal that you wouldn't touch either my niece or nephew and in return I would try to steer them away from the journals. We made a deal and you broke it!"

"Whaaat? When did I do that?" Bill asked in a faux innocent tone, flipping the tassel of Stan's hat over and then floating away before the man could hit him hard.

"My nephew just told me that you visited him last night. Care to explain that?"

"OH, right! Yeah... Funny thing about that-"

"God damn you, Cipher! I should have known that you'd pull something like this!" Stan growled, taking a bold step forward, but not making any move to strike the demon any.

"I didn't break a thing, 'Stanford'. As I seem to recall, you failed at keeping those kids away, and I didn't 'touch' your nephew, per say." Bill pointed out.

" And that means?" Stan growled once more, his anger rising the more the demon spoke.

"Let's just say, everything you care about is about to change, the universe is a hologram, and some of the other junk I usually say but forgot about! Buy gold, and BYE!"

With a quick swipe of his cane, the dream demon suddenly vanished in a cloud of smoke.


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: Welcome to chapter 4 of WTETU!**

 **Summary: Strange dreams did happen, how stranger would it be. If they met, at midnight, in the dreamer's scape.**

 **Warning: yaoi kissing and what not.**

* * *

 _Soft groans passed through Dipper's lips as a slight pressure settled onto his chest and midsection. It didn't hurt him, but it made his heart race as his whole body began to feel warm. Not uncomfortably hot, no, like the pressure, even this heat felt nice. Cracking his eyes open, he began to search the world around him, and groaned when he realized that his bedroom had been replaced once more with the dull and grey backdrop that was the dreamscape._

 _'How do I keep falling asleep like this!?" The human groaned, sitting up with a bit if difficulty and looking down to where the earlier pressure had once been._

 _He found it to be present in the form of a slightly chubbier stomach, one that he had not fallen asleep with. Gasping, he made quick work of reaching out and touching it gently. It simply radiated warmth, and for a moment, his free hand felt chilled in comparison to his now warm one. Frowning, he withdrew the hand quickly before attempting to stand up._

 _"B-Bill!" He grunted as he stood up. "Get out here right now! You have some explaining to do!"_

 _A familiar and very irritating laugh answered to Dipper's shouts, as the boy suddenly felt a presence nearby him, but coming from an unknown direction. His blood froze in his viens, with the only warmth he got coming from that strange spot on his body. Biting his lip, he had the strangest feeling that he would soon find out why._

 _"Hello, Pine Tree." Bill's voice sounded near Dipper's ear, causing the boy to flush just a touch at how close it was._

 _"BIL-" Dipper wheeled around on his heels as fast as he could, but was shocked at what or rather who he saw standing behind him._

 _Standing before him, there was a man with tanned skin, sparkling blue and yellow eyes, with strands of what looked to be silky blonde and black hair covering one of said eyes. For clothing, he wore that of a dapper gentleman, with a yellow tail coat with a brick pattern and black lining and matching pants. A black top hat and golden cane completed his look, and for the longest time, Dipper was at a loss for words._

 _"Long time no see, Pine tree. Where ya been?" Bill's voice came from the man, who proceeded to walk over to Dipper and smack his lower back gently with his cane to bring him back to reality._

 _"B-Bill?" Dipper gasped, wincing a touch at the dull pain he had received from the cane smack._

 _"The one and only." Bill retorted, fixing his hat further down his head, only to lift it back up with his thumb in a charming way. "But again I ask; where have you been?"_

 _"Avoiding you!" Dipper exclaimed, rolling his eyes up to the heavens and then back. "But it seems like I wasn't missed."_

 _"Aww, and why think that?" Bill cooed, gently using his free hand to cup Dipper's chin._

 _"Seems like you've gone and found yourself a new 'puppet'." With a grand gesture, Dipper pointed to all over Bill's seemingly new body._

 _"What? This old thing? Nah, this is my mest-bag form. Only exists in the dreamscape though, but I thought I'd bring it out for-" Bill was suddenly cut off by a hard punch to the face as Dipper growled lowly in his throat._

 _"I don't care about that! I have questions and you've got answers!" Dipper yelled as he straightened out but kept his fists tightly clenched._

 _"Fire away then. You've only got a limited time slot in the dreamscape though, so hurry up and make it quick." Bill huffed, folding his arms over his chest as he spoke._

 _"First off: what was with that weird dream!?" Dipper demanded, folding his arms over his own chest in a similar fashion._

 _"I told you already, kid." Bill responded as he rolled his eyes. "Would I ever joke or lie about something like that?"_

 _"I-I don't know! Maybe you would or- do you realize how crazy and messed up this is!?" Dipper groaned, grabbing a fistful of his dark hair and pulling at it hard. "And now I can't stay awake with blacking out and returning to this damn place!"_

 _"Pine tree, calm down." Bill frowned suddenly, walking over to the human male and pressing his own hand over his tummy suddenly. "Trust me, kid. This isn't going to last for long."_

 _"W-what do you mean?" Dipper muttered, feeling tears perk at the corners of his eyes._

 _He didn't know why, but he was suddenly very tired and fell very deflated despite only being within his own mind. Tears began to stream down his face quickly, as Bill made quick work of cupping his face once more and gently began to rub away Dipper's tears. At the feeling of the other's soft touch, Dipper couldn't help but to sigh softly in content. Drained and tired were soon replaced with the aforementioned warmth, that now radiated from both his midsection and from the gentle hands on his face. It was comforting, but before he could bask in it, it was suddenly taken away as Bill straightened out._

 _"I'm sorry, Pine tree, but what's happened can't be reversed, so you'you're just going to have to bare with it for a little while longer." Bill huffed with a bit of an anxious tone present in his voice. "Then you won't have to worry about it."_

 _"S-so I really am pregnant?" Dipper stuttered, his heart racing as he looked down at his stomach and swallowed a lump in his throat as he felt something stirring within him._

 _"Just a for a short while, and only in the dreamscape. As soon as our little girl is born then I'll take her away and you won't have to worry about her again." Bill replied with an idle shrug of his thin shoulders._

 _"L-little girl!? I-I'm going to have a daughter!?" He didn't know if he should laugh or cry at this situation._

 _On one hand, he had always wanted a daughter. On the other hand, the situation was messed up enough as it is, but now Bill was suggesting taking away his first child forever!? A child that he didn't even know nor fully except yet! Several different emotions hit Dipper hard, but he just didn't know how to express them all at once._

 _"Kid? Don't get all sappy on me. Remember, after you have her, I'll take her off of your hands." Bill said with yet another careless shrug of his shoulders._

 _"Like hell you will!" Dipper yelled suddenly, now rubbing his stomach gently. "This situation may be messed up, but I'm not letting you take her away!"_

 _"Is that so?" A warm smile suddenly spread across the dream - demon's lips as he placed his own hand over Dipper's and began to rub gently. "That's what I like to hear. I knew this was a good choice."_

 _"G-good choice?" Dipper gasped, blushing just a touch at the warm hands on his body._

 _"Pine tree, I'd love you tell you, but we're almost out of time as is, but maybe next time." With that, he gently took his hands away and drew the boy in close._

 _"I-I just got here though." Dipper frowned, gently snuggling into the other's hold as he spoke._

 _"You'll be back. The more you visit then the fast she grows." Bill teased, suddenly pressing his lips to Dipper's in a messy but still gentle kiss._

 _Dipper blushed softly, but for once he found that he didn't mind being so close to his enemy. Everything about him and the life he had placed in Dipper made the human feel so warm and loved, that he really couldn't hate a thing about it. Blushing heavily, he broke the kiss quickly and glared up at Bill._

 _"Woah! Hold it!" Dipper gasped, wiping his mouth of all evidence of the kiss off of his mouth. "I don't swing that way, Bill!"_

 _"Is that what you think, kid?" Bill laughed suddenly, drawing Dipper back in once more, pushing his unruly bangs away from his face, and kissing his forehead gently. "I've been through your mind and back already, and I can tell you quite a few things that you don't care to admit to yourself."_

 _"S-such as?" The boy hissed, blushing at the still tingling feeling on his lips and forehead from the kisses._

 _"I could show you, but-"_

 _"Damn it, Bill! Would you just stop playing games for once and be blunt with me!?" Dipper growled, finally managing to push Bill fully away from his person and then quickly stepping back._

 _"Do you really want to know, Pine tree? You really want to know what your beloved Grunkle Stan has been keeping a secret from you since the day you were born?"_

 _"G-grunkle Stan? W-what does he have to do with this?" Dipper muttered, stepping slowly away from Bill as the dreamscape went from grey to pure back all around Bill and him._

 _"You're a special one, Pine tree. Ever wonder what that stupid little mark on your forehead meant, or why I chose to return to you even though I made no former arrangement with you?" Bill smirked, pressing a slender finger to Dipper's forehead._

 _"Its just a birthmark! W-what are you even getting at?" Dipper retorted, trying to get away from the demon once more._

 _"Is that what they told you? Poor kid. You've got a lot to learn then before she arrives." Bill smirked, suddenly stepping back. "Your Grunkle tried to keep this from you, but ask him if he remembers the name: I_ _nopinatum."_

 _Before Dipper could even reply, thick cords from the blackened surroundings began to bind his limps, wrapping all around his body and squeezing the air out of him. All the while, Bill remained calm and collected, watching as the cords began to cover the human completely._


	5. Chapter 5

There was nothing sweeter than the sounds of a child's laughter. That is unless one is not in your home, or at least not one that laughs in such a way. Upon the first time he had heard the sound that day, Stanley knew that the laughter was not from one of the twins. Their laughs were sweet and truly innocent, but this one was hallow. Hallow and echoing in even the most crowded of places.

It had been going on for a good portion if the day now, happening at strange times during the day, often nearby to where Stan was. Soft and scattered at first, it had been getting louder and more frequent ever since the great uncle had spoken to Dipper and to that dream annoyance, Bill just a few hours earlier. Now, it was going on one in the morning, and Stan felt the hairs on the back of his neck stand up in anticipation of the being who should not be. He was even more on edge than ever now, worried mainly for his great-nephew, Dipper, especially in the state that he was in. With Dipper's mind and sanity in a fragile state, he was even more of a target for whatever was there.

'Hahe!' It echoed from beside Stan's bedside, just as the grandfather clock down the hall began to chime wildly.

The echoes of laughter and chiming of the clock were enough to wake the dead, and if Stan had been any other person hearing the sounds, he would have thought that he was slowly descending into madness. However, he knew better, so here he now stood, with the journal that he had first obtained clutched tightly in his hand. Reaching into his bedside table, he withdrew a packet of salt, ready to take on whoever it was within his bedroom.

"I swear, if this is who I think it is... Then Bill's gonna have the fury of a Grunkle to deal with..." He said lowly as he drew his finger down the page slowly, searching for a chant of sorts to use.

In his time in the Mystery Shack, he had learned a thing or two about expelling unwanted guests from his home.

Feeling a weight soon settle back into the room as the chimes ended, Stan's heart began to hammer in his chest as he began to work faster, quickly slashing a small line across the side of the circle he had created on the floor, leaving a small section of it open.

'Inopinatum aperire de existentia!'

The moment he did this, he heard it, and if he had to take a guess, he knew that he would be correct in guessing exactly who it belonged to. Before it ended, he closed the circle just as everything around him went blank.

The grey backdrop of the dreamscape overtook that of Stan's bedroom, alerting the old man that he was asleep and no longer in his room. Usually, he would have been startled or even mad for waking up here, but today it was exactly where he wanted to be. He had a hunch about what Bill had said earlier, and now he was going to act off of it. Stepping forward, he began to walk slowly around the dreamscape in any direction that he felt the weight of another being in, all while listening for the giggling to start up once more.

"Oh, so you're a dream demon..." Stan muttered, his mind quickly going back to Bill for an instance and what he had said earlier, about how everything was going to change.

"Okay, so let's find out what the hell bowtie was yammering about." He muttered, but was soon growing frustrated when he couldn't find who he was looking for.

"Hahe-hehaha!" The giggles were getting louder now, and Stan's fists began to clench slightly.

Directly ahead, he could feel the childish joy that often came with a small kid at play still, but it was quickly fleeing from him the closer he neared.

"A kid dream demon..." Stan muttered, simply taking a stab at what was before him. "Whoever it is, I wonder if this kid is just trying to play or something..."

"Haheheaha!" Pausing, an idea suddenly came to his mind, and he made quick work of closing his eyes , covering them with his hands, and then waiting for the sounds of giggling again.

The moment he heard them, they were closer to him, just a few inches away and still within his basic earshot. Quickly, he opened his eyes quickly and looked up to find that nothing was there. Frowning, he covered his eyes once more, now playing a mock version of the peek-a-boo game with a seemingly invisible dream demon. Each time, he would hear the giggle, but would not see its owner.

"This isn't working..." Stan muttered, before smacking his forehead with his palm. "Probably because you're not playing it right, genius. How does it go again...?"

This time, he was going to play the game right, but with a twist added, for the baby dream demon's sake.

'Vidi te!' After yelling that at the top of his lungs, he uncovered his eyes quickly and before him, there was now a maroon mist floating about the room.

It had no form, but the moment it 'saw' Stan, it began to move about, forming half-hearted shapes and then ending with a little heart shape. From around them, the walls of the dreamscape began to melt into a murky grey and black, only to suddenly turn a light shade od baby pink with the craziest flowers growing all around, making the once grey scape now take on the form of a baby's colouring page. However, it soon stopped changing and the flowers reached their large size before everything went still. The moment it stilled, the child's giggle from before began to emit from within the mist, and the sound caused Stan's heart to sink.

"I knew it..." Stan mumbled, walking slowly towards the mist.

"S-st-s-" The mist gurgled at the sound of his voice, causing Stan to wince just a little.

"Yeah, it's me. Now why don't you just-"Growling, he reached into his pocket, fabricating a glass jar with a lid before scooping the mist up into it with a seemingly good amount of ease.

He didn't expect it to be so easy, so he just stood and held the jar firmly as he waited. He had been expecting a catch, so now all he had to do was wait for it to come.

"Stanny!" The mist suddenly wailed, the jar now shaking in his grasp.

"Zip it, kid." Stan spat down at the jar, now holding it up so that he could see the mist. "I'm not letting you out until that son of a bitch triangle gets here."

"He wit momma!" The mist cried, the shaking suddenly stopping as the mist formed two little eyes.

They were deep brown in colour, with little eyelashes flicking upward from the strange lids above and below them. For a moment, Stan felt a weight settle into his chest, as he found that the eyes now matched the trait that the members of his family shared.

"Oh, so you're a girl this time? That's a first." Stan grunted, suddenly shaking the jar rapidly. "Cut the crap. I've seen you take on a better form than this."

"Can't!" The fog grunted in a similar fashion to Stan. "Not big enough."

"Then at least talk like an adult. I feel like I'm beating up a kid and its making me uncomfortable." Stan muttered, frowning at the jar once more.

"Ca-" The mist was cut off suddenly but a shrill gasp from who could only be Bill.

Stanley looked around quickly, and found the triangle demon just a short distance away with his own mass of mist, only his was black on colour and just a bit bigger than what Stan had trapped.

"Stan Pines!" Bill growled, clenching his noodle limbs into a tight ball of fists.

"Hello, Bill." Stan shot back, slowly lowering the jar from his face. "Fancy seeing you here, and by that I mean that I totally expected you."

"No duh, but tell me why the heck you have my kid in a jar!" Bill snapped lowly, trying to float closer to the pair, only to be stopped by a field of some sort. "W-what the heck!?"

"I'm not an idiot, Bill. Even this old hack knows a thing or two about salt circles." Stan snapped, holding the jar containing the maroon mist from before. "Now tell me why 'shes' back in here! Last I checked, this thing should have been completely obliterated from existance from the last time."

"I don't have to tell you anything, Stan!" Bill snapped angrily, his fists tightening as his own mist began to writhe in what seemed to be pain.

"Oh really, then how about I just exercise this little bastard again an-"

"Stan! Don't!" Bill suddenly yelled sounding distraught for once as his shoulders slumped and his head bowed. "Fine, you got me there..."

"Good, but since you can't reach me from here, I think I might just do it anyway for fun, you know? Since you broke your promise you Isosolise terd!"

Bill's head remained bowed as Stan spoke, and for a moment the con man felt as though he had won this round, however, what Bill did next shook him to his core. The triangle began to snicker softly, the sound growing louder and louder until he was soon howling in his amusement.

"What's so funny?" Stan demanded, his free hand clenching into a tight fist as his eyes darted over to the black mist besides Bill.

"Stan, Stan, Stan. You realize that if you kill my baby, then you also kill-" He paused, gesturing to the dog as it cleared up just enough for Stan to see a pair of deep brown eyes filled with fear staring back at him. "Your great-nephew."

"Damn you, Cipher." Stan hissed, suddenly tucking the jar into his pocket and glaring at the other.

"Its your choice, Stan. Either you let her go, or I hang onto Pinetree here for a little while longer." Bill snickered.

"Hand over Dipper first and then I'll give you your brat back." Stan said in an honest tone. "Deal?"

"Well, I do like a good deal." Bill replied, suddenly casting Dipper's body from the mist and into the circle near Stan.

Stan looked quickly down at Dipper to make sure that he was alright before taking the jar back out and slowly unscrewing the cap. Bill was a dangerous and crafty one, so Stan was not going to take his chances and try anything funny, especially with the hold that Bill still had over Dipper. Slowly, he removed the lid and let the mist float out and then back over to Bill.

"Here's your kid, now leave mine alone before I come back in here and kill you both!" Stan shouted, shaking a fist at them both angrily. "If I hear about one more dream from Dipper then I'm killing you twice, Cipher!"

"Oh, I doubt that, Stan." Bill snickered, suddenly gathering the mist into his hands until it took the form of a little baby, still developing. "Now say bye-bye to your great Grunkle Stan, sweety."

"G-gre-!? Just what exactly are you getting at, Cipher!?" Stan barked, bending slightly to gather up Dipper into his arms.

"Oh, I think you know exactly what I mean." Bill cackled, only to disappear in a flash as he always did.

As he did, Dipper suddenly stirred as his eyes, which had closed at some point since his fall, flashed open. At first, Stan was relieved that Dipper was alright, but then he was downright terrorized by what had just happened. Looking down at the boy, he saw that his lips were moving slowly.

"I-In- Inopinatum..." He kept muttering under his breath, causing Stan's blood to chill as he watched Dipper's skin beginner become transparent.

"We're waking up, kid. Don't worry, it's just a dream." Stan lied, though now he wasn't sure if Dipper would believe him when he woke up for not.


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: Inopinatum's POV after the events of chapter 5.**

* * *

'Have you ever wanted to escape?

Just for a day, go somewhere completely different? Where no one knew you for who you were and you didn't know them?

Just leave your old life behind and venture into a world, where your not a monster... But a hero?

Even if it was just for a day? Would you escape?

Imagine. Being in your own little world.

There would be no more pain and no more running.

Just falling, falling, falling...

Falling... Free fall, if you will.

Have you ever wanted to be free like that? Ever at all?

I have... I always have...

I've wanted to be free from this place...I wanted to escape from it all...So one day...I did.

I escaped into a world that was all my own. A world where I had friends and a family. A world where I was happy.

This is the story of the day I was set free...

Of the day I escaped...

The day I never looked back at.

Or at least it was the day that I tried.'

* * *

I laid in my warm little dreamscape, watching the sparkles of my fading mother and great-great-uncle paint my once pure grey scape blue and white as they went. Then it was all over, and I found myself alone again, with no mommy or daddy around. Just me, suspended as a disembodied cloud, never growing or breathing now that my mom was awake. It would have been boring in here, if it weren't for the sudden change in my scape like nursery, and a small bundle of cloth appeared suddenly in my hands. It had a round head, and white hair, with scraps of blue fabric making up his body.

This was a cloth child, I think. One of many that daddy must have made a deal with, but was given to me instead as a play thing. A single piece of thread held his whole body together, and I could tell that this one must have been weak, but the last string he has is very strong and it keeps him together.

Fuzzy, white strings from a what felt to be a knit sweater made up this cloth child's hair, which was cut short and yet was still very poofy in the front. For eyes, wet paint still clung to the fabric head, and it was just with one brush of my finger that the paint began to smudge, and the black dotted pupil broke open like a chicken's egg. A small river of blue and black slipped down his cheek.

"He must be very sad, so he is crying." I figured, frowning at the broken doll. " He just lost something in a terrible way... Maybe because of my mommy or daddy..."

Tearing off a sheet of fabric from his body, I wrap it around his bad eye so that only one was left. There, he was being punished. Punished for being sad, because that isn't allowed here. In my world no one is sad, they are all supposed to be happy in my scape. That's the way I always wanted it so that's how it had to be. He would have to learn this. Not on his own, of course.

Setting thr cloth child down on the floor, I wait for more of them to appear. When one does, I take her into my arms. She was made from what smelt like an old blanket, and had more strings than Rthe white haired child, but her strings are weak, despite having many. I liked her the most of the two, because she always smiled and she sounded like a bell whenever I shook her. Her green eyes would sparkle from the rhinestones they had come from, and her blonde locks, made from the same string that kept her together would knot and tangle if she moved to much. So she always stays still to keep her hair from moving.

"You have a new friend now." I said as gentle as I could as I set her on the floor next to the crying child. "Keep him smiling okay?"

I had her wrap her arms around the small boy to keep them warm. Then I sighed, turning my head slightly and finding that I now had four other cloth children that I needed to tend to. One cloth child, that looks a lot like my mommy, is close to my side. He is the tallest of the three, and since he looks so much like mommy I figured he would be a good protector and put him with the blonde and white haired children.

"Keep them safe, they are your friends now." I tell him gently, patting his nose. "They are really good, I think, so stay with them okay?"

The mommy doll nodded his head, and satisfied with this answer, I turned to the last of the cloth children. An angry old man is the second closest now. A permanent scowl was painted on his face. Hes not angry at the other cloth children, I don't think, but more so himself. Its his fault that the doll next to him, his brother, had to go away. His brother was made of China glass, that was broken in several places. The angry brother must be lonely like me, but he deserves what hes getting, so I make him live away from the others.

"That'll teach you to be mean..." I muttered as I picked up the last two dolls.

I named the one in my right hand Mable. Its a funny name, because she looks just as funny and she makes me laugh. The last of them, I named Soos. He is very strong compared to the others. Not just in shape, but by the thread that holds him together, just like Mable. This makes them kindred spirits and best friends, so I keep them together.

"Now everyone has their own friends and space." I say to them, curling up slowly on the floor. "I hope daddy makes me new dolls, because I want a whole town to play with... Both in here and when I get out."

* * *

'I always wanted to escape this place, but my little town still needs me in here, and when mommy's awake, that means it's my turn for nap time again.'


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: When To Expect The Unexpected: Chapter 7: Reading Your Dreams.**

 **Since my very first encounter with Bill, I've found myself dabbling in the concept of dream reading. Scientifically, I understand that basic dreams are based off of pre-existing memories and chemical functions within the brain that conjure up lucid images that we as people label as dreams, but dreams created by Bill are different... Theres a certain realness to them, as well as a symbolic nature within them, much like those few symbols on the Cyph- Wait, I'm not sure if you 'The reader' are at that point yet... Also, he may still be watching me as I write this message to you, so I will leave the rest for you to figure out on your own, and I'll see you again when I make my appearance again shortly. Remember, in Gravity Falls there is no one you can trust.**

 **TRUST NO ONE!**

 **(Except for the young lady who I met while writing. She seems trustworthy enough, and will hopefully fill you in on the rest without Bill finding out.)**

 **-The Author Of The Journals, Stanford Pines.**

* * *

"I-In- Inopinatum..." He kept muttering under his breath, causing Stan's blood to chill as he watched Dipper's skin beginner become transparent.

"We're waking up, kid. Don't worry, it's just a dream." Stan lied, though now he wasn't sure if Dipper would believe him when he woke up for not.

 _..._

 _Even before this line was written, I knew that the audience would have guessed that Stan would be lying about Inopinatum's existence to Dipper, even if his nephew was already briefed on what was going on by Bill. Truth be told, Stan is supposed to once again take the place of Ford before the author's upcoming appearance, souly because he WOULD lie to Dipper about her, while Ford would let to much slip all in the introduction of the new dream demon girl._

 _In another truth, I fear that you all know already who or rather what Inopinatum is. She isn't a dream, and neither was he (her father). They both were concepts, made tangible in the minds of those who dared to glance at them long enough to take them into consideration and make them into more than just simple thoughts. Inopinatum was always there in the back of Dipper's mind since the day the boy had his first thought. She was a concept that existed within him as a fleeting thought, the crazy and unconnected ones that you have right before you go off to sleep for the night. It took Bill coming into the world to bring this concept to light, almost forcing Dipper to consider her further into reality..._

- _The Purpledragon6_

* * *

AND NOW YOU MEATBAGS ALL KNOW THE BASICS ON HOW THIS LITTLE CUTIE WORKS. BUT, OH WELL, WELL, WELL, THE STORY AIN'T OVER YET. SO WHAT DOES THIS MEAN FOR YOUR BELOVED PINETREE AND THE REST OF THE PINES FAMILY ONCE THEY'RE ALL TOGETHER? WELL, I MAY BE A DREAM DEMON, BUT EVEN I DON'T KNOW WHATS IN STORE FOR THEM.

GOOD LUCK!

-BILL


End file.
